"Sex and Violence"--Stone Temple Pilots

Ever since I moved back to North Carolina, I've been listening to a lot more radio. In addition to listening in the car, I also listen at my parents' house. My mom is sort of obsessed with radio, and has a whole system where she listens to only one station at a time until she absolutely can't stand it anymore. She plays this station basically all day at a shockingly high volume in most rooms of the house. As you might imagine, this is a lot of fun for me, at least when I am visiting my parents.

Although I'm always sticking up for pop country music (see earlier posts), several grueling and demoralizing months on Country 94.7 have diminished my enthusiasm slightly. You can imagine how excited I was when my mom finally made the switch to 96 Rock, whose slogan "Everything that rocks" is either genius or dumb.

96 Rock is a locally-owned station, which is actually pretty awesome since most stations around here are owned by ClearChannel, which is the Evil Empire. Wikipedia tells me that the station started in February of 1998, "playing everything from Chumbawumba to Hendrix." They still play a similar mix---in other words, "things that are musically important but boring" and "things that really suck."

There is a lot of angry yelling about girls and a lot of unintelligible mumbling about drug problems. Sometimes people are so upset about girls that they have to do drugs and then smash things, and, in the case of more acoustic groups, possibly cry into a bottle of whiskey afterwards. Often I want to find the name and artist of a song by googling the lyrics, only to realize that I can't hear any of the words distinctly enough to google them.

I'm not being entirely fair, though--every now and then they play some stuff I really like. Although I was not 12 years old or a boy in 1994, for some reason I have always loved both Collective Soul and The Stone Temple Pilots, so there are times when I feel deeply comforted by this station. Other times, like when they play Puddle of Mudd, I am not deeply comforted.

One cool thing about 96 Rock is that the DJs seem to really care about the music. Because it's locally-owned, I think they get more control in picking the songs, and that seems to translate into more personal investment in the station. I just listened to an entire monologue about whether the new singer of Alice in Chains is better than the old one, and before that there was an impassioned speech about how The Red Hot Chili Peppers, in ten years, will be considered legends on the level of The Beatles. You might not agree (and gawwwd, do I not agree on that one) but you gotta appreciate the earnestness with which these people appreciate cock rock.

"Battlefield"-Jordin Sparks

I guess I am kind of on the Complaining Train these days. Sorry about that. But I really want to take issue with this new Jordin Sparks song, "Battlefield."

Now, ya'll know that I am a fan of The Pop Music. I am not going to diss something on the basis of it being tasty and kind of gross like a bag of neon orange Cheddar and Sour Cream ruffles. I will eat the whole bag of that.

However, this song is like, I don't know, Reduced Fat knock-off brand Pringles. For god's sake. It is marketed as being awesome but it is not. At all.

The song was written by The Runaways, the writing/production team that brought us the also-mediocre "Love Like This" by Natasha Bedingfield ft. Sean Kingston. Wikipedia has some quotes from Jordin Sparks about how she responded when they first brought the song to her. Here is one: "He played the song and honestly my jaw hit the floor." Jordin. You should get that looked at. I am going to google "jaw doctor" for you.

Apparently critics really like this song. They have compared it to Beyonce's "Halo" and Leona Lewis's "Bleeding Love," which are both universes of quality beyond this one. Another song that is a lot better is Jordin Sparks' other hit "One Step At A Time," which is actually fantastic. So it's not like she's never done anything reasonable. Plus, that "When The Levee Breaks" beat is so awesome, if it can't make a song good, there must be something real broken about it.

Look, we've already established that it's bad. But the worst part is that "Battlefield" is a straight-up rip-off of Pat Benetar. I checked on the internet to see who else was irritated by this. Some random-ass person on "answers.yahoo.com" (this is where I go to solve all my personal problems and find out important world news) asked if the new song was based on the old one. And someone responded: "I don't see how. They are nothing alike. Incidentally, Michelle Branch, Faith Hill and The Prodigy each made songs called "Breathe" that sound nothing alike."
BUT the concept of breathing is kind of a big deal. We all have to breathe every day, like, all the time. Love being a battlefield is a bit rarified, don't you think? As much as there is a ring of truth to it (people in love fighting woahhhh), I think we could hit this particular metaphor once and then move forward to a new one. How about "Love is a dentist's chair, I am dreading it" or "Love is imitation crab, full of mystery." I am giving these ideas to you for free, just to get you started.

I was listening to this song while I wrote this for more ideas, but I had to turn it off in the middle of the second listen. It is THAT BAD. I'm going to go listen to "Halo" now, and possibly eat some of those Cheddar and Sour Cream ruffles, now that I'm thinking about them.

see if you can get through it once

"Old Time Rock and Roll"-Bob Seger

Is it just me, or are songs that are about "rock and roll" some of the most boring songs on the planet?

Exhibits A, B, and C:

1. "Old Time Rock and Roll"-Bob Seger
2. "I Love Rock 'n Roll"-Joan Jett & The Blackhearts
3. "It's Only Rock 'n Roll (But I Like It)"-The Rolling Stones

If you have to state your case for rock, you're already overstating it. Suck, suck, and more suck.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j6UJZtCz1-c

"We Weren't Crazy"-Josh Gracin

Not to be beating on my country music drum all the time, but I feel I have to make a point about country songs because no one else seems to be doing it.

I've been driving around town a lot lately listening to radio, and I will admit that a number of the songs that come on the country station are totally sucky and I have to change the channel after like thirty seconds. An example of this is "Cowboy Casanova," by Carrie Underwood, which is a big old mouse poop of a song. Like, for real, it is the worst.

However, today I was washing dishes and heard "We Weren't Crazy" by Josh Gracin. As with a lot of these songs, sometimes the verses are neutral---as in, they're not really good or bad, and it's only in the context of the chorus that you can decide whether to be into them or not. But once that chorus came crashing in, I was heading for my laptop to find out what it was called so that I could buy it.

The concept of this song is a simple one: they were young, they were wild, they were restless, but they weren't crazy. People thought they would never make it, but then they did. And now they have babies and and are sticking their tongues out at everyone like, "nanny nanny boo boo."

I know what you're thinking, and I agree that this could all add up to a very bad, very stupid thing. But it's the chorus that saves it, by having that rhythmically seductive hook that winds around itself like the best country choruses do. It's fast, and you can yell it, but it pushes against the chord changes in just the right way. Especially the melodic choices on "We were lovin' blind / borderline reckless," and the way "lovin' blind" internally rhymes with "borderline." I mean, I just cannot say enough good things about this hook. As with vegetarian chicken patties, you have to try it to believe it.

Plus the whole concept is kind of romantic---"We had a lot of fun, didn't we? And we still do."

In conclusion, the best country songs are the ones that come in halfway through and hit me in the back of the head and make me cry a little bit, even when I'm not about to get my period.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P0AOQTZpi8Y

"Challengers"-The New Pornographers

I was doing "song a day" but it seems like if I can start shooting for "song a month," that will be a good goal.

This is the best song about forbidden love EVARRRR plus it has the banjo in it which makes it even hotter.

The music video showcases these elements (banjo + forbidden love) plus Neko Case drinking some radioactive soda out of a plastic cup.


http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHWWWa8EvzI

"Slow Show"-The National

"You know I dreamed about you for twenty-nine years before I saw you/
You know I dreamed about you/
I missed you for twenty-nine years"


This song is a time capsule that I'm not allowed to open until I'm 29.

"My Routine"-Don Lennon

"My Routine" is probably one of the best songs I've ever heard about wanting to be an artist. It's sung from the perspective of a guy working as a clean-up boy at a supermarket (or something similar) whose real passion is stand-up comedy. Any "creative type" (is there a way to use that phrase without self-loathing?) who has worked at a shitty job can instantly identify with the first lines: "I know I seem spaced out, I'm / Working on my routine all the time."

What's great about the song is that it approaches the subject matter on a number of levels. There's something equal parts pathetic and inspiring about the protagonist, as there maybe is about any struggling artist. Sometimes he seems grandiose, especially when he awkwardly speaks in the language of professional comedians, and this is the source of many the song's humorous moments ("Some of my stuff is kind of old / But I don't wanna take it out, I mean, it's gold"). And sometimes he seems impressively determined, as in the double meaning of "So bring me the dustpan and the broom / Somebody get me the vacuum / Cause I'm about to clean up here, just watch me." But above all, he cares about his craft, which is what elevates his narrative from simple boasting.

The music that accompanies the story sets just the right tone, and Lennon sings the character as entirely earnest but with a hint of melancholy. After all, wanting to be a comedian is tough. The real-world consequences of being a committed dreamer are briefly touched on in the part about the bookstore job he liked but lost: "Inspiration struck me and / The boxcutter jumped out of my hand."

Overall, there's a sense of inevitability--even if he never makes it, even if he sucks, comedy is what he was born to do. And the song's emotional complexity comes in part from the fact that he could be the next Steve Martin or Lenny Bruce, but maybe he won't. He doesn't know; we as the audience don't know. But we do know that Don Lennon, the songwriter, has made something magical happen, even if most people don't know who he is. And that in itself is a triumph.


listen here

"I'm Only Sleeping"-The Beatles

"I'm Only Sleeping" is sung by John. But then on the line "Keeping an eye on the world going by my window," Paul joins in on harmony, and the three words "by my window" just pop straight out of the song in 3D Paul-ness. It's like, "Woah, THERE he is." On the ends of phrases in particular, he's unmistakable.

Do you ever think about how weird that is? That a person's singing voice is like handwriting---can be imitated but never exactly copied? People can complain about Paul forever, but he has something that no one can take away, which is that he's Paul.



listen for it around 1:16 and and again at 2:04

"You Belong With Me"-Taylor Swift

This is a great pop song with a very satisfying music video. Country is where the good pop writing is these days, people.







NEWS FLASH: nerd ends up with boy

"It's Mighty Dark To Travel"-Bill Monroe & His Blue Grass Boys

My friend Johanna suggested that I talk about "music for travel and transience." She is currently traveling in Europe and seems to be in a different country every time I talk to her.

Music for travel is something I've always been kind of interested in. I'm actually moving soon, and last night I had all these dreams about suitcases. Freud would probably refuse to analyze that one on the grounds that it is too obvious, and does not have enough to do with penis envy. (Someone told me the other day that I overuse the word "penis." Whateverrrrrr)

Anyway, I especially like listening to music in a moving vehicle. Each vehicle, in my mind, has a different personality or mood. I find that I often feel melancholy on buses, especially because usually I'm taking a bus at night. Because you're not driving the bus yourself (hopefully), there's a kind of helplessness to a bus, hurtling through the dark, that lends itself to thoughts about the passage of time. Specifically the whole thing where it's swift and irrevocable. But there can be a beauty in that, too, so music that is somehow beautiful can support that feeling and make it less aimless/desperate. My friend Dan sometimes recommends albums to me for bus trips, and one of his recommendations that I liked in particular was Grouper's Dragging a Dead Deer Up a Hill. It was beautiful but also had the added plus of being great for all the states including and in-between awake and sleeping.

Trains can be a lot of things. Trains can have that sort of sad bus-feeling, but also there's a relaxed quiet, and sometimes a hopeful kind of "pioneer spirit" thing going on. Trains seem to go by big open spaces like corn fields a lot, and that makes me feel expansive, like there's a lot out there and a lot to look forward to. Classical music is good for trains, especially Aaron Copland. Or super old bluegrass. The Copland is expansive, and the bluegrass has that "chunka-chunka" rhythm that imitates the train. That shit makes you feel like you are IN A FILM, specifically one about the power of American optimism and what an incredible country we live in. But in the good patriotism way, not the crappy kind where people get killed and foreigners have bad mustaches.

I think cars are kind of my favorite, because there's a sense of being in charge. Listening to music while driving is pretty awesome, but even sitting in the back with the window rolled down can be exciting. Driving is kind of like dancing (a motion that you are in control of being paired with music) so I find that songs that are good for dancing are also good for driving. Missy Elliott, for example. Also, music that makes you feel like a badass---for example, The Rolling Stones or The Stooges.

Airplanes are not great for music because there's always that loud noise, and not much sensation of actual movement. But people listen to music anyway, just because it's boring on an airplane.

The last thing I want to say is about ferries and boats. A ferry is THE BEST PLACE to listen to music, because you can stand outside with the wind whipping through your hair and be covered in sun and sprays of water. I recommend a little melodrama on a ferry, like Arcade Fire, or "Born To Run."

The song I picked for this post is "It's Mighty Dark To Travel" by Bill Monroe & His Blue Grass Boys. This would qualify under the category of "songs for the train." People call Bill Monroe "the father of bluegrass" because he helped to develop the style. If you don't know Bill Monroe, you should check him out. Bluegrass and country music, overall, really understand that whole mournful side of travel ("travel and transience," as Johanna put it)-- that movement reminds us of the passage of time, that the passage of time is inevitable, and so loss must also be inevitable:

It's mighty dark for me to travel
For my sweetheart, she is gone
The road is rough and filled with gravel
But I must journey on and on

Giddyup!

Ricky Skaggs tribute version, closer to the sound of the original recording

Bill Monroe performing the song with Jim & Jesse

"Fig Tree"-Sarah Green

Sarah Green is my housemate. She also happens to be a very talented singer and songwriter.

It's cool living with another songwriter because you get to see a little bit of someone else's process. I tend to write songs that are more on the pop end of the spectrum, so when I get nervous I'm often worrying about being too "mainstream" or "silly." Sarah's songs are more folk-influenced than mine, and she was telling me today that she sometimes worries about being too "fruity."

Of course I told her that her songs were not fruity, because they aren't. But that made me think about what the term meant, since I completely understood what she was talking about. I am a fan of folk music of all types. However, some folky songwriters ARE fruity. Why does that happen?

I can think of two reasons: a) Lack of sense of humor. b) Cliched and boring word choice.

Sarah's songs are the kind that can make you cry, but her sense of humor is always there quietly in the background as a steadying force. It's not like she's telling jokes or anything, but it's more the feeling that when the song is melancholy, there's something else there balancing it. Perspective, maybe, or the possibility of change.

And in terms of words--she's also a very distinguished poet, so she is literally a pro at placing and choosing them.

Everything I've heard of hers, I've liked, but today I'm really into "Fig Tree," which is written from the point-of-view of someone incarcerated at Guantanamo. Heavy stuff, I know. But the personal quality of the song keeps out any kind of melodrama or preachiness. And she's a master of those phrases that just pinch your heart in the right spot---when she sings "I keep the real yes or no in my marrow" and "A fig tree a man could count on / With a library of leaves below" I get all quivery. You will see what I mean when you listen to it, in the link I have so conveniently provided for you below.

Sometimes I sing Sarah's songs to myself in the shower. It's an interesting feeling to know that the writer of the song could walk by the bathroom and hear you.


listen to "Fig Tree" on myspace

"Walk A Thin Line"-Fleetwood Mac

Those that know me know that I like Fleetwood Mac even more than I like McDonald's, and sadly, I like McDonald's a lot.

My parents owned both Rumours and the 1975 self-titled album (the one with "Rhiannon" and "Landslide") and I completely devoured them. This was at a time (seven or eight years old) when I was basically only willing to listen to Paul Simon, The Beatles, and The Everly Brothers, so adding another band to my roster of gentle and melodically-inclined white people was a Big Deal. Since then I have loved them passionately and felt that I had to protect them from accusations of second-rateness, lame-itude, and generally only having a few good hits but being overall kind of milquetoast (I just learned this word and this is the perfect occasion to use it).

I didn't grow up with the album Tusk though, so when my friend Ian sent it to me, I was worried about getting my hopes up too much. I was afraid that if I didn't like it, I might be proved to be NOT A REAL FLEETWOOD MAC FAN which would be equivalent to not being a real Tarheel or not really needing glasses but just wearing them to look cool.

Luckily, the album is just fantastic. After more than fifteen years of loving those other two albums, I think I might (gasp) like this one the best. It cost something like a million dollars to make and includes the University of Southern California's marching band playing on the title track. What's amazing is that it still sounds like a Fleetwood Mac album (you can hear the voices of the songwriters coming straight through) but then there are also all of these interesting and even weird musical and stylistic choices that add so much to it.

Here's a story that I promise is related: Some friends and I once came up with a game/theory (game theory?) called "Indie Rock or Bonnie Raitt?" The idea is that all music can ultimately be put in either the "indie rock" or "Bonnie Raitt" category. I love Bonnie Raitt just as much as I love indie rock, so this is not a discussion about quality, it's a discussion about type. Obviously this can cause all kinds of heated arguments (that's kind of the point, I guess) because some bands or artists are really on the line between the two.

The point is that for my whole life I've been sure that Fleetwood Mac is Bonnie Raitt. But after listening to Tusk, I'm convinced that they're indie rock. Wikipedia tells me that Lindsey Buckingham tried with this album to "allow punk rock and New Wave influence into his work." I definitely hear it.

"Walk A Thin Line" is just an incredible song. It's slow but in this tightly-controlled, percussive, powerful way, landing heavily on each beat and chord with a quality that falls somewhere between the regal and the sexual. I'm also convinced that the "oh-wa-oh-wa-oh-wa-oh-wahhh" backing vocal line is the forerunner to the "oh-la-oh-la" backing vocals in The New Pornographers' song "Challengers."

Some people call R.E.M.'s Murmur the first indie rock album, but I say it happened four years earlier with Tusk. That's kind of a wild claim, I realize, but I am WILD about Fleetwood Mac.

"Black or White"-Michael Jackson

I'm sure everyone has heard by now that Michael Jackson is dead. I'm still working on wrapping my head around it. I can't really imagine a world in which he doesn't exist; then again, my friend Emily made a good point when she said that in some ways it's like he's been dead for a while.

"Black or White" has special significance for me. When I was six years old, I was in my first play. It was part of this summer program at the Carrboro ArtsCenter where they let a bunch of six-year olds write their own play and perform it (I don't know who decided this would be a good idea, but miraculously it was).

Our play was called "Dancers and Demons," and the idea was that a mad scientist had somehow trapped dancers from around the world inside of glaciers, and other dancers had to go rescue them. I was a dancer from Egypt and performed an impassioned improvisational dance to "Walk Like An Egyptian" by The Bangles. Then at the end, when everyone was rescued and safe, our counselors cranked up "Black or White" and we all ran around the stage in our multi-cultural dance costumes and shook it like crazy. We danced like we were being possessed by the holy spirit at an old-fashioned revival. It was one of the most ecstatically joyful single moments in my life to this point, and I think about it every time I hear that song.

Michael Jackson: even if you died of a broken heart, or even if you go to a scary zombie purgatory where sad child stars go, you should know that you brought some people a lot of happiness.

"One Last Breath"-Creed

I feel guilty now for saying that Creedence Clearwater Revival are cave people. Especially since they are an Important Band. I'm not very good at saying that music sucks. I would never be good at writing for Pitchfork.

This reminds me of the time my friend Andrew said he hated The Postal Service. Everyone was surprised because he doesn't usually complain about stuff. Then, two days later or something, out of nowhere he was like, "I feel bad about what I said about The Postal Service. A lot of people really like The Postal Service."

I realize that a lot of people really like Creedence Clearwater Revival. And Norah Jones (laundry-folding music). And Wyclef (just comes on other people's records and makes them more annoying). And Santana (Mr. Guitar W. Wankerson, middle initial stands for "Wanky").

I feel better for getting that out of my system. Now I'm going to make up for being a bitchy hater by telling everyone that I have always liked this one song by Creed.

Are we even?


my songwriting professor would call this "well-crafted"

"Where Everybody Knows Your Name"-Gary Portnoy

why is ted danson orange








i hope it's not on purpose

"Ooby Dooby"-Creedence Clearwater Revival

this song was originally written by some dudes named Wade Moore and Dick Penner.

that's right, it took TWO PEOPLE to write this crap. i know, i'm surprised, too. i thought it was written by adam sandler BACK BEFORE HE WAS BORN

roy orbison should have known better than to sing this song, but you can't really fault creedence clearwater revival because they are cave people. that's just my personal opinion.


ccr fans please explain to me

"The Hustle"-Van McCoy

my "business of songwriting" professor gave me a dollar for correctly naming the artist that did this song.

that's right, i am a huge suck-up. and i have ONE DOLLAR

"Break My Body"-The Pixies

If you listen to The Pixies enough, you always stay young and cool and subversive.  The Pixies listen to a lot of Pixies, and it worked for them.

listen here

"Konichiwa Bitches"-Robyn

Robyn came out with "Show Me Love" in 1993.  You might remember this song if you are a girl and you were alive at that point.  I guess she was probably doing stuff between then and 2005, but I didn't know about it.  Somehow though, in that span of time, she must have decided that it might be cool to be the Missy Elliott of Sweden.

Hard shoes to fill.  She does an admirable job.  Don't try to resist the feeling of indestructibility that creeps up on you as you listen to these lyrics:

You wanna rumble in space?

I put my laser on stun.

And on the North Pole,

I'll ice you, son.

Yeah!

you know when shit is gettin' heavy like it weighs a ton

"Mama Said Knock You Out"-LL Cool J

DON'T CALL IT A COMEBACK








blaaaaaw, how ya like me now